JOURNEY OF A LIFETIME​
​REINVENT: TO ORIGINATE A NEW IDENTITY


Published in Perspective, Winter, 1995​

​​Imagine that you have embarked on a wonderful journey to a distant, exotic land. 
 
Although you have never been there before, you look forward to melting away your stress in this tropical paradise. The landscape is diverse with amazing sights and unexpected thrills for the senses. Rugged cliffs lead down to pristine beaches and sparkling turquoise water. The dense rain forest contains a marvelous collection of unusual wildlife sounds, fragrant flowering plants, and rainbow-misted waterfalls. There's also a small swamp with magnificent birds, the hidden desert, and some shark-infested areas. You are especially excited to experience the brilliant sunset from the ridge of the ancient volcano.
     
If you were to actually take this trip, you would encounter a new frontier for yourself. In order to find your way and accomplish what you want, it would be useful to have a map that provides the lay of the land. Similarly, a map is valuable any time we take steps in a new direction.
OVERVIEW

When we consider our desired change (e.g., career, relationship, activity), a map or view gives us a framework to see where we are going. It orients us with respect to our destination. We are able to view the entire countryside as well as the locations of specific attractions (e.g., waterfalls) and dangers (e.g., sharks).
     
This orientation allows us to determine the questions we need to ask ourselves and others to chart our course. What do we want to do? Where do we want to go (e.g., forest or beach)?
   
These questions foster strategic thinking about how we will make the journey. What's the fastest way to the beach? Where is the scenic route to the desert? Will a car be able to make the trip, or do we need to consider other modes of transportation?
   
This thinking supports effective strategies, and helps us become aware of and eliminate self-defeating habits. What are our usual blind spots or predictable breakdowns when we travel? What do we need to remember for our excursions?
     
As we follow these steps, we engage the process of creative change. This process or journey brings us to our positive future (i.e., our desired destination).
​
​A NEW IDENTITY
​
One specific application of this creative process involves the exploration of a new identity. In preparation for this adventure in the Land of Change, we might begin with a fresh mindset.
​
In the beginner's mind there are endless possibilities, in the expert's there are few. — Suzuki Roshi

From the interior space of a beginner's mind, we look out over the shifting features of the Land of Change and reminisce. We remember how our previous trips to this mysterious land were typically required by others (e.g., spouse, employer) or by circumstances (e.g., illness, divorce). We know that whether the situation was "positive" (e.g., a new job) or "negative" (e.g., unemployment), we often felt overwhelmed by the prospect of the journey and unable to effectively navigate our way.
     
Now, we want to break out of our automatic, habitual reactions and act with awareness. We believe that out there, somewhere, are many opportunities for us to reinvent ourselves and experience some aspect of our lives in new ways. We look into the vast horizon of possibilities and wonder how we can get there from here.
A MAP
​
The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes. — Marcel Proust

The view or perspective that we will use for this self-directed journey is represented within the Creative Change model, seen below.​
This model of the creative change process is one map of the frontier we are exploring. As is true for any map, there are many different possible versions and we can use the map in a variety of ways to guide us. In any case, although it is important, the map is not the territory. It is not the process and does not create change. We do!
VALUES
​
Experience is not what happens to you but what you make of what happens to you. — Aldous Huxley

The journey out into the Land of Change begins from within ourselves. In this place, we ask ourselves: What is really important? What matters or has significance for me?
     
What we value and what we deem significant has a powerful impact on all the other aspects of the change process. Wherever we are in the process, our values illuminate the issues and provide a solid foundation for our efforts. Our values also serve as the compass for our trip and help us re-orient ourselves when we go off in some unexpected direction or lose sight of our destination.
     
When we determine our values, we define our motivations as well, since we are most likely to act on the basis of what is important rather than unimportant to us. If we examine these motives in more depth, we can discover our intentions for the change we want to experience. Within the heart of these intentions, in the realm of who we are, we can experience our sense of purpose. Our purpose is the root value that centers us for the journey ahead.
ASSESSMENT
​
If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in bed with a mosquito. — Bette Reese

In preparation for the trip, we must assess our current status. We ask ourselves such questions as: Where am I now? What are my individual strengths, skills, talents, and distinctive competencies? What do I bring to the situation? What qualities or characteristics do I have that I admire?
     
The assessment is designed to bring to light all the capabilities (i.e., both actual and potential) that we have available to use throughout the change process. Therefore, it is critical that we fully recognize our positive traits without editing ourselves.
     
If we take the trip into the Land of Change with another person or with a group, the assessment can also describe our "team" profile and collective strengths. We can examine the nature of our relationships, our history, similarities, differences, patterns of interaction, and anything else that we believe has an impact on our journey together and successful arrival at our destination.
     
With this information we are equipped to ask other questions including: What are the implications of the assessment for us? What do we feel passionate about? What attracts or excites us? What can we get enthusiastic about doing? How do we want to participate in this adventure? What do we want to contribute?
     
In this way, a comprehensive assessment allows us to clarify our present location. From this vantage point we can then ask ourselves what we are grateful for right now. This great attitude, gratitude, positions us for the trip.
 
These questions allow us to mindfully reflect on our own gifts and gratefully acknowledge the difference our presence makes for ourselves and our fellow travelers.
IMAGE
​
The best way to predict the future is to invent it. — Alan Kay
​
The next step in our process involves the designation of our desired destination. The kinds of questions we might ask ourselves at this point require a change in our frame of reference. That is, to play with the possibilities that exist, we shift our view to the destination (i.e., our future) and look back from there to the starting point of our trip (i.e., the present).
     
We pause for a moment—relax—and imagine that it is sometime in the future, and we are experiencing all of the sights, sounds, thoughts, feelings, people, objects, and other aspects of this wonderful place in which we have what we want. As we allow ourselves to fully enjoy this scenario, we "step into” our future selves and ask: What are the characteristics of my ideal? What am I doing? How am I feeling? What is my experience of myself and others?
     
The experience of our future image or vision has a vital connection with our values. If the image is compelling for us, then it will pull us toward it. When this pull is combined with the motivational push of our values, we have a feeling of alignment. The alignment gives us a strong internal sense of direction and helps us make our way through the barriers to our destination.
     
If the push exists without a compelling image, then we may feel motivated and not know where to go with our enthusiasm. If the pull exists without the motivation, then we may find ourselves wishing and not taking any action. Thus, the alignment encourages us to integrate our heart's desires with our passionate dreams to joyfully create our positive future.
     
Some other questions to ask to help define the future image are: What do I not want to experience (i.e., my undesired future)? When do I want the desired future, or under what circumstances? How will my life be different? What symbol or metaphor captures the essence of my future image?
 
The definition of our desired destination is not always clear. We frequently don't know the details of where we are going and we may never have traveled the road before. Therefore, we specify what we can and then use our personal integrity to guide us in the right direction.
BARRIERS
​
Whether you believe you can or can't, you're right. — Henry Ford

After we have established our values, conducted an assessment, and created a positive future image, we explore our barriers with these questions: What do I need to reach my destination? What stops me? What are the obstacles in the way of achieving my future image? What are my limiting beliefs and fears? What are the predictable breakdowns? How do my usual choices, ideas, and perceptions blind me? What are the resources that are not being fully used?
 
We can ask these questions from the perspective of our present location, or we can, once again, imagine ourselves in the future looking back. From the future vantage point, we simply ask about the barriers that we met along the way.
 
When we actually design a trip through the Land of Change toward an unfamiliar place (e.g., a new identity), we frequently begin to encounter our own resistance to the process. Our limiting beliefs such as, “I don't deserve to get what I want. I'm lazy. I'm terrible with money,” form the seeds of this resistance and eventually sabotage our efforts. Furthermore, we may believe that the new destination is outside our comfort zone and we're afraid that we won't be able to handle what will happen there. Specific fears (e.g., the unknown, success, failure, rejection, abandonment) keep us in unproductive "What if...?" cycles and block us from being present to ourselves.
     
Over time, these limiting beliefs, fears, and other barriers become self-defeating reaction patterns or habits that support a distorted view of the Land of Change and reduce the field of possible destinations.
PLAN
​
A pile of racks ceases to be a rock pile when somebody contemplates it with the idea of a cathedral in mind. — Saint Exupery

In order to break through our barriers, we ask ourselves some critical questions: What are the opportunities hidden within the obstacles? What are my short- and long-term strategies to overcome these barriers and transform them into opportunities? How can I use brainstorming to create new options? What systems are needed? What are the key factors for success? What would I do if I knew I couldn't “fail” or only had six months to live?
     
We might also examine some of the dynamics of our barriers. For example, when existing in our comfort zone, are we really comfortable, or just fearful of everything outside the zone? When we feel afraid of the unknown, what is it that is feared? Are we worried that what has happened in the past will occur again in the future? What stops us from enjoying the unknown? In what ways does our thinking (e.g., either/or, good/bad, catastrophizing) or communication style (e.g., aggressive, compliant) interfere with our effectiveness? How can we see fear as our ally? What retraining is needed to handle our fears and expand the comfort zone? What are the "stories" (from the past) that are associated with our fears and limiting beliefs? What are the choices we can make about these stories to give them new meaning? What are some ways to deal with predictable breakdowns? How can we take more responsibility for our lives?
     
If we follow this process and respond to questions such as these, we become aware of the discomfort, pain, and other feelings associated with the barriers that have stopped us in the past. By allowing ourselves to stay with these intense feelings (i.e., experience them as they are), we discover the empty core of our fears and limitations.
 
This realization frees us from the barriers' hold, and we can return to the natural ease of our presence. We are then able to be fully ourselves, increase our choices in life, and transform any barrier (crisis) into an opportunity for growth. In this way, our plans become fluid strategies to effectively deal with the obstacles on our journey.
ACTION
​
Sit, walk, or run, but don't wobble. — Zen Proverb

With all this preparation, we are ready to engage in the trip. So, we ask ourselves: What small steps are we willing to take now to initiate the plan. What is the progression and timeframe of these actions?
 
Once we have transformed our barriers, we reduce the conflict in motivation between our desires and our fears. We act solely on the basis of desire and what we are genuinely willing to do. Our change process then becomes creative.
     
Thus, the journey through this land begins with small, specific steps that will enable us to transform our barriers, and eventually achieve our desired destination.
SUPPORT
​
The burden of self is lightened when I laugh at myself. — Tagore

The final step in the process requires that we ask ourselves what internal and external rewards or supports are needed to maintain the efforts in achieving the future image.
     
If we were asked to buy a car, use it, and never fix it when it breaks down, we would laugh at the request. We know that we need to provide maintenance for the car to last. Unfortunately, we often ignore this step when we attempt to make significant changes in our own lives. In this scenario, the outcome is predictable. If we have not identified the support necessary to sustain ourselves, we feel the usual stress and strain associated with our efforts, and we become overwhelmed and unable to reach the desired outcome.
     
Support also comes in the form of recognition. Throughout our journey, it is essential that we acknowledge the changes we and others have made. Every small step in the direction of our destination must be supported, rewarded, recognized, and celebrated!
CONTEXT
​
Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world. — Lily Tomlin

When we travel through the Land of Change, there is a destination in mind. The destination, or positive future, exists in a specific context. With respect to a new personal (or corporate) identity, for example, the context might be our relationships, career, or spirituality. That is, what is our desired future image for a new identity at work? with our friends? in terms of our spiritual beliefs? Any aspect of ourselves or component of our organizations can be considered as the context for the process of creative change.
​
People say that what we're all seeking is a meaning for life. I don't think that's what we're really seeking. I think what we're seeking is an experience of being alive. So that the life experience that we have on the purely physical plane will have resonances within that are those of our own innermost being and reality… So that we actually feel the rapture of being alive. That's what it's all finally about. — Joseph Campbell
CONCLUSION

The trip to our new frontier began with an overview and a map. When we use this map to create, achieve, and sustain positive future images over time, we might notice that we are also building a beautiful spiral chain. At various points on the chain are the multifaceted jewels of our evolving identities, representing manifestations of what we have been in the world. These jewels are related at their centers by an unchanging, universal spark of light that reflects the essence of who we are. Thus, the chain mirrors our life experience.
 
The adventure into the Land of Change is repeated countless times for the sake of our growth and freedom. The reinvention of ourselves, then, is the journey of a lifetime.
​
We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time. — T. S. Eliot

​​Copyright © 1994- by David J. DePalma. All rights reserved.